You will be a shoe-in for the best joke teller with these 122 Horse Jokes for kids!
We have a great collection of 122 Horse Jokes for Kids for both kids and adults alike! Jokes are a great way to learn and have fun at the same time! These Horse Jokes will keep your kids both interested and laughing!
What other Horse Jokes have you heard that you love? Leave them below in a comment and I will add them to the list with your name! (If you would like)
Have you made one up? That is even better!
More Horse Posts
Horse Unit Study; full of facts, resources and printables
There are more horse posts in the works and coming soon so stay tuned! 😊
Follow my Horses Pinterest Board for dozens of ideas from all around the web! I am constantly finding new things to add so there will be new things all the time!
When is National Horse Day?
There are several days to think of and show our love for horses!
National Day of the Horse is December 13th and there is a National I Love Horses Day on July 15th each year.
There is also World Horse Day on March 1st.
More Jokes
The Horse Jokes
Why did the pony have to gargle?
Because it was a little horse
Why did the horse miss the jousting event?
He had the knight off
What is a horse’s favorite state?
Neighbraska
Where do you take a sick pony?
To the horse-pital
How slow was the race horse?
He was so slow that they had to pay the jockey overtime
What do you call a horse that lives next door?
A neigh-bor
Where do horses shop for clothes?
At Old Neighvy
How do you get a wild horse to accept a halter?
You turn the stables on him
What did the horse say when it fell?
I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup
Who is in charge of a horse town?
The Mare (mayor)
What kind of horse can swim underwater without coming up for air?
A seahorse
What do horses see right before it thunders?
Lightning colts
Why did the horse have an extra shoe in his saddlebag?
He was afraid he’d get a flat
Where do knights park their horses?
In a LanceLot
Which side of the horse has the most hair?
The outside
When do vampires like horse racing?
When it’s neck and neck
What do you call a horse who is your best friend?
Pal-amino
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Stable tennis
How do you know when a horse has a negative attitude?
He says neigh to everything
What did the vet say to the horse with a sore back?
I see you’re a little saddle sore
What do you call a horse that likes to stay up late?
A night mare
What type of a computer does a horse like to eat?
Macintosh Apples
How long should a horse’s legs be?
Long enough to reach the ground
How do you get a jockey to wait a moment?
Tell him to hold his horses
What do you call a horse who lives in Baltimore?
A Mare-y-lander
What do you call an insincere small horse?
A phony pony
Where do horses get their hair done?
At the hair saloon
Why did the horse play his music so loud?
He liked being a herd animal
How does a cowboy get a stallion to do odd jobs around the farm?
Pay him under the stable
What did the pony scout do?
A good steed every day
What happened when the cowboy fell off his horse?
His saddle skedaddled
What kind of movies do horses like?
Horse operas
What’s the quickest way to mail a little horse?
Use the Pony Express
Where did the pony family go for their summer vacation?
The Horsea Shore
What do you call a Shetland pony who’s pulling a plow?
A teeny furrow burrower
What did the farmer say to the horse?
Getting you saddled is a real cinch
What do you call a horse’s tail?
A horsefly flyswatter
What has four legs and walks backward?
A horse in reverse
What do every horse and rider do together?
They age
What do you give a sick horse?
Cough stirrup
What award did they give the horse who could drink the most water?
They gave him a nice trough
Where do horses cook their meals?
On the range
Why did the horse wear glasses?
He was a little farm-sighted
What’s the difference between a Western horse and an Eastern horse?
About 2,000 miles
Why did the horse run away in the middle of its wedding?
It got colt feet
What does a pony use to get warm at night?
A saddle blanket
How did the cowboy know which horse was everyone’s favorite?
He took a gallop poll
What do you name a horse you root for?
You name the horse radish
What happened when the horse swallowed 4 quarters?
It bucked
What do you call a well-balanced horse?
Stable
What happened when the cowboy told his red horse bad jokes?
The roan groaned
How do horses send letters to each other?
With a stampede
What do you call a one eyed horse?
Cyclippity-clops
Why did the man stand behind the horse?
He was hoping to get a kick out of it
What does it mean when you find a horseshoe?
A horse is walking around bare foot
Why does a pregnant horse run faster?
It has two horse power
What do they serve before dinner in the stable?
Horse d’oeuvres
How do horses from Alabama greet horses from Ohio?
With Southern Horspitality
How do you make a small fortune in the horse industry?
Start with a large fortune
Why was the horse feeling so stressed?
It was saddled with responsibility
How is a horse spontaneous?
It always does things in the spur of the moment
How is an egg like a young horse?
You can’t use it until it’s been broken
What’s the difference between a horse and the weather?
One reigns up and one rains down
Why was the horse really proud of his school test results?
Because he got an Hay-plus
What was the name of the horse musical?
Fiddler on the hoof
Who were the two most famous horse thieves?
Bonnie and Clydesdale
What’s as big as a horse, but weighs nothing?
The horse’s shadow
What do you ask a sad looking horse?
Why the long face?
What ailment do horses fear most?
Hay Fever
What street do horses live on?
Mane Street
What is a pony’s favorite juice?
She really likes lemon-neigh’d
What do you call a story about a runaway horse?
A tale of WHOA
What’s black and white and eats like a horse?
A zebra
What kind of bread do horses like to eat?
Thoroughbred
Who helps the horse stable cleaner?
His co-pile-it
Why did the skinny dog start eating hay?
The doctor told him to gain weight, he needed to eat like a horse
What did the horse ask his teacher?
Equestrian
How are clouds like horse jockeys?
They both hold the reins
Why did the cowboy feed his horse so much hay?
He thought it would make it softer to ride on
Why did the farmers laugh at the bucking bronco?
They got a kick out of him
Where does a person end and a horse start?
At the centaur
What did the mare tell her filly after dinner?
“Don’t forget to clear the stable!”
What do you call a horse that can’t lose a race?
Sherbet
Which kind of horse likes to eat baked beans?
The pinto
Why couldn’t the pony sing?
Because he was a little hoarse
What type of horse has trouble keeping track of its iPad?
An Appaloosa
Do you know why horse stalls at the racetrack are labelled A, B, D, E, and F?
Because no one wants to bet on a seahorse
How do horses cast their vote?
By saying yay or neigh
Why do cowboys like to ride horses?
Because they’re too heavy to carry
How much money does a bronco have?
A buck
Which horse can jump higher than a house?
All of them – houses can’t jump at all
What did the waiter say to the horse?
Can I get you a stable
Why did the pony get an F on his report?
Because he missed the mane point
How did the mare mix a cake?
She used stirrups
How do you hire a horse?
With two pairs of stilts
Why did the horse cross the road?
Because somebody shouted hay
What did the mother horse say to her foal?
It’s pasture bedtime
What show was the horse actor appearing in?
A little horse play
Where do newlywed horses stay after their wedding?
In the bridle suite
What NFL football matchup is always a win-win for horses?
Broncos vs. Colts
Why do most horses look so fit?
Because they’re on a stable diet
Where do horses stay at night when they travel?
Red Hoof Inn
What’s the hardest thing about learning to horseback ride?
The ground
When does a horse go to sleep at night?
Whinny wants to
What do you call a horse that’s not wearing a saddle?
Neigh-ked
What do you call a horse that’s a world traveler?
A globe-trotter
Why can’t horses dance?
They have two left feet
How did the cowboy ride into town on Friday, stay for three days, and ride out on Friday?
His horse’s name was Friday
Who isn’t an upside-down horseshoe good luck for?
The horse who lost it
What’s the best way to lead a horse to water?
With lots of apples and carrots
Why did the horse talk while his mouth was full?
He had bad stable manners
What do you feed a race horse?
Fast food
What do you call a boy named Ryder who likes to ride a horses back?
Horse Back Ryder
Why do horses like to fart when they buck?
Because they can’t achieve full horse power without gas
What do young horses wrap their food in?
Aluminum foal
What’s the difference between a horse and a duck?
One goes quick and the other goes quack
Which route do crazy horses take through the woods?
The psycho-path
What looks like half a horse?
The other half
Which US state do horses like to go for vacation?
Mane
What did the horse say in the hundred acre wood?
I can’t hear you Winnie
What do you call an equine carpenter?
A sawhorse
What’s do horses play for fun?
Stable tennis
If you make it, play it or use it, let me know! Rate it and leave a comment below. I love hearing from you!
Be Sure to Pin so you can find it easily later!
Are you following me on Pinterest? I have been working very hard making new boards I think you will love and am adding dozens of new pins from all of the popular homeschooling websites!
Come join us on our Facebook group, Loving Homeschool. I am adding daily pictures, links and much more than I would on the blogs and it is a place for you to find support from others on the same journey as you are. Come and share with others, ask questions and learn! And if you love recipes, follow my Best Recipes You Will Want To Make group on Facebook! Feel free to share your own favorites and find many new ones there!
I enjoy offering free printables and resources to bless my readers. Your frequent visits to my blog and purchases through affiliate links and ads keep the lights on so to speak. Thank you!
Cindy
Welcome! I am a wife, mother, mother-in-law, Grammy, daughter, sister and retired homeschooler. I enjoy writing about things I have learned over the years, sharing recipes and tips with others and making free printables for parents and teachers.
Visit my other website for all kinds of recipes and tips at MyProductiveBackyard.com. Enjoy! 🙂
